Back in 2014, at the Church of God in Christ’s 107th Holy Convocation in Memphis, a young man announced to the entire congregation that he was free from homosexuality with the memorable words, “I’m not gay no more!”
After Pastor Earl Carter asked the man, Andrew Caldwell, what brought him to church, Caldwell just let loose:
CALDWELL: To get delivered more!
CARTER: To get delivered. Do you believe that the Lord tonight has set you free?
CALDWELL: Yes sir.
CARTER: Turn around and tell those people! Tell ’em!
CALDWELL: I’m not gay no more! I am delivered! I don’t like mens no more! I said I like women! Women, women, women [speaking in tongues]. I said women! I’m not gay! I would not date a man! I would not carry a purse! I would not put on makeup! I will, I will love a women!
And everyone totally believed him…
But if you had any doubts, Caldwell recently told BET’s I Went Viral that he has a girlfriend. (Like, a real one.) And he only gets hard for her. (Seriously, he said that.)
“Now I get hard for women. I don’t get hard for men. Ain’t nothing wrong with a flirtation but I’m still delivered,” he declared in a recent interview with BET.
“I always been in church my whole life but as grown, I was new to it. I was only going to church just to shout and to see who I was gonna sleep with — what pastor. But at that church, they want that (homosexuality) delivered out of me. They snatched that out of me,” he said.
Yep. That’s how The Gay works. They just snatch it out of you, and suddenly, women give you erections. Just like Jesus promised.
He claims wedding bells and “little Caldwells” are in the future… I only point this out now so that I can link to this post when he’s caught with another guy about two months from now.
(via Joe. My. God.)