When Jesus Thinks You’re Too Fat, It’s Gwen Shamblin To the Rescue March 16, 2014

When Jesus Thinks You’re Too Fat, It’s Gwen Shamblin To the Rescue

In the just-posted Gwen Shamblin compilation below, the nineties diet guru from Tennessee talks (in multiple inadvertent double entendres) about “how to transfer a relationship with food over to a loving relationship toward God.”

My favorite line:

“He is not a wimpy lover; He is a passionate, jealous god!”

Also:

“Let him feel you as you have never been feeled before.”

That’s hawt.

According to to a reader-in-the-know at The Dish,

Around 2000, [Shamblin] founded her own church, the Remnant Fellowship, made up of hardcore adherents of her weight-loss program. It operates like a classic religious cult, using information, emotion, and behavior control to keep members in the group.

If you want to learn more about eating the Jesus Way, and Ms. Shamblin is just a little too retro for you, fear not; God peddlers like Rick Warren and Philip and Agnes Maynard will be glad to teach you to slim down while you unabashedly Savior your food.

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