Back in August, Bishop Xavier Novell Gomà made global headlines after announcing his resignation from the Catholic Church. That itself wasn’t a huge shocker, though it was newsworthy given that he had once been the youngest bishop in Spain (at the age of 41). The reason this was headline-worthy was because he stepped down after falling in love with Silvia Caballol, a divorced woman who wrote erotic fiction with a Satanic twist.
So this guy fell in love, then pursued that relationship instead of obeying his priestly vow of celibacy. Good for him. The Satanic erotica was irrelevant but a detail that just made everything so much better.
Now there’s another wrinkle in his story that will make your jaw drop another few inches.
According to Spanish media, Novell has already found a new career path: He’s working for a pig semen company that “produces and distributes” only the highest-quality pig liquid.
Novell’s job? “Masturbating the pigs.”
A priest said to know Novell told Spanish media: ‘It’s like the Parable of the Prodigal Son in the Gospel of Luke, the son who abandoned the Father to lead a debaucherous life, and ended up wishing to eat pig slop.
‘But in this case it’s the beast/devil, because he masturbates them.’
Animal rights issues aside, I’ve never been so delighted to see the words “priest” and “masturbation” in the same story. These things usually end much, much worse.
As I said before, though, Novell isn’t the hero you want him to be. For years in his previous vocation, he conducted exorcisms and promoted gay conversion torture. Handling pig semen, then, is a major step up for him.
(Screenshot via YouTube. Thanks to Rob for the link)