Yesterday, Brigham Young University announced that it would finally begin serving caffeinated beverages in the Provo campus’ dining hall.
While some people believe caffeine is banned in the Mormon religion, that’s not the case. (Hot drinks like coffee are also a no-no, and people have long made the assumption caffeine is the reason.) The school says caffeinated soda was just never offered at BYU due to a lack of demand — which is hard to believe — but students have been purchasing the drinks off-campus for decades without a problem. Now, it’ll be a little more convenient. Students (and no small number of jealous graduates) overwhelmingly rejoiced at the move.
Here’s a roundup of some of the more entertaining responses.
You had to wait until 2 days before the world is going to end?! Thanks a lot.
— Cliff Wong (@cliffwong_OC) September 21, 2017
This is what happens when your football teams starts 1-3.
— SWC Round-Up (@swcroundup) September 21, 2017
How bad does BYU football have to get for them to allow coitus? #BYUcaffeine
— Brett Borg (@BrettBorgScout) September 22, 2017
What if I told you… a lifted caffeine ban could turn an entire football program around.
ESPNs #30for30 presents "BYU's Caffeine Curse"
— Brian Fagan (@bdfagan) September 22, 2017
— Bruce F. Webster (@bfwebster) September 22, 2017

BYU students trying things out tonight:#BYUCaffeine pic.twitter.com/Y8vPhmh0W2
— Craig Hall (@hcraighall) September 22, 2017
congrats to byu for legalizing caffeine, with this initiative they may soon accept other radical notions like consent and gay people
— Goth Ms. Frizzle (@spookperson) September 21, 2017
"Miracles don't occur anymore"
Me: pic.twitter.com/bCwOerYHXx
— Things Mormons Like (@TheMormonLikes) September 21, 2017
If this isn't the most "Utah" breaking news alert I've ever seen…. pic.twitter.com/A4lla650eF
— Allison Croghan (@AllisonCroghan) September 21, 2017

Perhaps the most interesting comment came from students talking about the economic impact this would have… on the gas stations near campus where they used to get their caffeinated drinks. They just lost a ton of customers.
All because followers of a religion that bans hot drinks now have an easier way to purchase Coca-Cola.
It’s times like this when you have to step back and realize how absurd all of this sounds to people who aren’t bound by irrational dogma.
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."