God Spoke to Her Through a Pineapple April 20, 2017

God Spoke to Her Through a Pineapple

There are times when pointing out why religion is silly takes some work. Maybe it’s comforting people in times of grief, or it’s offering hope when they have nowhere else to turn.

This is not one of those times.


Recently, God has been speaking to me through the use of Pineapples. Yes you read that right, Pineapples. How has a simple, common fruit become the source of Heavenly revelation you ask? Well, let me tell you.

Yes, please go on, young missionary…

… did you know that it takes a single pineapple three whole years to reach maturation? That is a LONG time for a single fruit. Through this, God has been showing me the importance of not rushing things.

I’ll stop there. Because she does this repeatedly:

  • Pineapples are ubiquitous today, unlike the past when they were considered delicacies. Your situation may not change, but your outlook can.
  • Pineapples take a while to mature… just like people.
  • Pineapples stop ripening after you remove them from the root source… so know your roots and don’t stray from them or it’ll hurt you.

They’re all ways you can compare a pineapple to life — or in her case, God. You can play this game with anything around you. It’s not hard.


God is like a baby’s diaper. He protects us during our worst moments, occasionally overflows with His love, and there’s an expectation we’ll eventually outgrow Him.

Damn, I’m good… Someone should give me a blog.

But none of that suggests God is speaking to me through a diaper. Or a pineapple. Or anything else, for that matter. Stop reading that much into a piece of fruit.

And if you are, at least admit God’s prickly and far more trouble than He’s worth.

(Thanks to Aven for the link)

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