In a Budweiser commercial set to air this Sunday during Super Bowl 50, Actress Helen Mirren, “a notoriously frank and uncensored British lady,” offers a brutal tongue-lashing to those who choose to drive drunk — summoning Charles Darwin himself to intervene with one of those gene-ending awards he’s known for.
Hello. I’m Helen Mirren, a notoriously frank and uncensored British lady.
The collective “we” are dumbfounded that people still drive drunk, so I’ll sum it up like this. If you drive drunk, you — simply put — are a shortsighted, utterly useless, oxygen-wasting human form of pollution, a Darwin award-deserving selfish coward.
If your brain was donated to science, science would return it. So stop it.
Now, the chances are you’re a fun, solid, respectable human being. Don’t be a pillock.
Your friends and family thank you.
The friends and families of other drivers thank you.
Your future self thanks you.
This is supposed to be fun!
[Grabs a Budweiser.]
Nice and cold.
The commercial is part of Budweiser’s #GiveADamn campaign, with which the company promises to donate $1 to safe ride programs every time the hashtag is used until the end of Sunday.