Yesterday, the Museum Of Idolatry blog posted an image listing the reasons Elevation Church — home of Pastor Steven “No One Can Know My Salary” Furtick — is the best place to work. While most of the list is what you’d expect from a church, some of the items reek of Pastor Worship.
#1) We serve a Lead Pastor who seeks and hears from God. (Seriously?)
#3) We serve a Lead Pastor we can trust. (As opposed to…?)
#7) We serve a Lead Pastor who pours into us spiritually and professionally. (In bed.)
#16) We serve a Lead Pastor who goes first. (What does that even mean?!)
A couple other items just seem strange…
#14) We are blessed to have our health insurance provided. (I guess it’s nice that your employer treats you like valuable employees… but I don’t know why that’s a “blessing” any more than if they wrote, “We are blessed to have a living wage!”)
#23) Two words: game time — we love competition. (Is that a subtle “Fuck you” to other churches? I hope it is. Jesus loves winning teams.)
For all I know, Furtick probably wrote up this list himself. Anything to draw more people to his church and give him the funds he needs to help pay off his $1,700,000 home.