What Do You Do When Your Spouse Believes in God?

Morning Edition on NPR is running a weeklong series on “Losing Our Religion” and today’s story focuses on relationships in which one person is an atheist and the other is not. Looks like they picked a perfect couple to profile, too:

So how does the relationship work? Even though they have different beliefs, they share common values:

“I hear it a lot from Maria, ‘You’re very spiritual in this way,’ and ‘You’re very spiritual in that way.’ And a couple days ago, I kind of joked with her, ‘That is a very secular humanist attitude, and that shows a lot of growth, a lot of not faith,’ ” Bixby says.

Bixby and Peyer may disagree about faith but they share common values…

…

“I can love you and think you’re wrong, and you can love me and think I’m wrong,” Peyer says. “So I appreciate this opportunity to grapple with it, and I appreciate you for being the one I get to grapple with it with.”

[This is where everyone lets out a collective “Awwwwwwwwww”]

For what it’s worth, the couple got together later in life, so deciding how to raise kids was never an issue for them. That can often be a dealbreaker in a relationship, since you almost have to pick a side and compromise may be even more confusing for the children.

Incidentally, five years ago, I wrote about a younger couple in a mixed-faith relationship. Update: They’re still together and doing very well!