Watch Those Hands, Dude Coming Out of the Bible May 22, 2012

Watch Those Hands, Dude Coming Out of the Bible

By Hemant Mehta
May 22, 2012

Tony Jones at Theoblogy points out that this image is making the Christian rounds on Facebook:

The word of God gets weirder by the day…

Apparently, it never occurred to them that humans are capable of hugging each other. (Then again, we *are* talking about the people who do side hugs…)

Tony also throws out a great question for the Christians passing it around: “What if the person getting the creepy hug were a man?” Would they be so quick to spread it around?

Anyway, the whole thing is just begging to be Photoshopped… so have at it.

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  • TheBigBlueFrog

    Not sure the origin of that image, but it’s been around a while, and the words are not the Bible. It looks like it’s been blurred by too many iterations, but the original image floating around on the internet is just a simple “I love books” visual metaphor.

    Christians will take anything and twist it to make it a tool for their harassment of nonbelievers and “other”-believers.

  • CelticWhisper

    “What if the person getting the creepy hug were a man?”

    Erm…I don’t get it.  Creepy paper-hugs are creepy paper-hugs, what’s the difference?

  • I’ve seen that image before sans religious phrase at the top. Kind of a nice thought — the comfort that books bring us. Too bad it’s been corrupted.

  • TheBigBlueFrog

    The first line says “I know it’s difficult not being able to see each other as often as we’d…”

    I can’t read the rest of it, but it’s not scripture. It’s a love letter or something like a love letter, and I don’t mean that creepy “love letter” where the guy kills himself at the end, brings himself back to life and then comes back later to kill nearly everyone left behind.

  • Abigail

    This was actually an ad for the Australian Post. So only the word of God, or someone from Australia…

  • TheBigBlueFrog

     I think Hemant is asking whether it would still be shared by Christians if the obviously male book man was hugging another man. It would take on a whole new meaning for some Christians, especially those in North Carolina.

  • glenmorangie10

    If I had a god, he wouldn’t be into Billy Joel.

  • Matto the Hun

    Yeah, you’d almost think that religion poisons everything o_O

  • Cortex_Returns

    So the image was taken from another source, unattributed? It’s official: Christians fail at every dimension of intellectual integrity.

  • TheBigBlueFrog

    Apparently the image came from an ad campaign by M&C Saatchi, Melbourne, for the Australia Post.

    http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/2007/australia-post-touch/

  • CelticWhisper

     Ohhhh, right.  Xian heterosexism and all that jazz.

    *sigh*

    I’m just going to take it as a good thing that my mind didn’t immediately spring to “People hugging people and they happen to have like chromosomes?  I say, my good Watson, some might think that unacceptable!”

    Shows I’ve been away from the Xian mindset for so long that not only do I not share it, but it’s beginning to seem truly alien to me.

  • Coweringomega

    I read the caption too fast and honestly thought it said, “If only the Word of God could do this…”

    I thought that would be pretty appropriate.

  • It’s originally from the Australian post office:  “If you really want to touch someone, write them a letter.” (http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/2007/australia-post-touch/)

  • TiltedHorizon

    A Venus Fly Trap hugs flies in much the same way.

  • Don’t worry, Carbonite Han Solo, we’ll get a scrub brush, and Luke will find those vandals!

  • Lee Miller

    Is it just me, or does the “hug-ee” have a drugged — or brainwashed — look on her face?  The whole thing looks really creepy to me.

  • Bride of Shrek

    In the original you can read a fair bit of it.  Apparently the “bible” craps on about drinking wine, Billy Joel and someone called Andrew…..  Billy Joel was in the bible, right?

  • And there’s a bit about Billy Joel music on the arm. Ah, the Gospel of Billy Joel… “And the lord spake, though didst not start the fire, twas always burning since the world’s been turning”

    Actually if you want to see the original a bit more clearly, look at the Australian postal service ads they swiped it from,  linked in the comments above

  • Aaron Scoggin

    I felt the same exact way about the Harry Potter books. Therefore, should I worship him and create a church so that others may worship him? Will that piss those Christians off enough?

    Oh, I think it will. 
    http://www.crossroad.to/text/articles/Harry&Witchcraft.htm

  • This needs Buscemi eyes.

  • Baby_Raptor

    Haha, no. Fallout:Equestria has given me vastly more comfort in the short time I’ve been a fan than the bible did in the 17 years I was a Christian. 

    *Any* message of any medium can touch people. 

  • Baby_Raptor

    I would join that. But I think we need a different word than “church”….

  • rey fox

    “It’s originally from the Australian post office:  “If you really want to touch someone, write them a letter.”

    Wow, that’s even more sad somehow.  Too bad the once proud postal services are mostly paper spam distributors now.

    I thought I saw the word “shit” just above and to the left of her head, but I guess it must not be.

  • That’s creepy.  Then again, so is religion.

  • Good and Godless

    Looks like “Billy Joel music” near the elbow, not exactly a biblical quote.

  • Tigger_the_Wing

    “What if the person getting the creepy hug were a man?”
    Ask, and it shall be given…

    http://i216.photobucket.com/albums/cc254/Tigger_the_Wing/Silly%20Stuff/WordHugs.png

  • rhodent

    ” If thou shouldst wake up in the morning with thy head ablaze and thy eyes too bloody to see, thou shalt cry in thy coffee, but thou shalt not come bitching to me.”

  • It’s interesting to see how often idealization destroys the base concept. A real hug from a real person isn’t enough now. Only a hug form the Bible itself will do, …and that is of course no hug at all. I practice, this is a rejection of human comfort, no more and no less.

  • Clearly, after reading that passage about the young girl who was gang-raped and cut into twelve pieces, I’m feeling embraced and safe.

  • Gina

    It was originally designed to be an ad promoting letter writing in Australia. Not about the bible. http://theinspirationroom.com/daily/2007/australia-post-touch/