Purity Bear Tells You to Stay Abstinent Before Marriage… AGAIN!

“Virgins who wait for marriage have a higher success rate.”

What does that even mean? Higher success rate at keeping their marriage together? Higher success rate for pregnancy? Higher success when collecting of creepy ass pedobears? 

She can’t even kiss him?
 

I actually don’t have as big of a problem with this commercial as the last one. The guy definitely came off as trying to get in her pants and if that isn’t what she was looking for backing off is good advice. 

However, she seems to want more so perhaps she shouldn’t be with him at all but that is hard to tell in the context given. The bear came off less creepy this time around. 

The statistics at the end were useless without context and the abstinence until marriage thing is a whole other issue. 

Overall, less creepy but still absurd. 

If you know anyone who doesn’t think fundies are operating at the cognitive and developmental level of children, show them Purity Bear.

So, all that sex I was having before marriage was depressing me and I didn’t even know it. This explains everything…

I did a bit of research on this just now, and it turns out that their second point at the end is completely bogus. According to a study done in 2008 and published in the Journal of Youth and Adolescence (I admittedly know nothing about this journal or those who did the study), adolescent boys who have premarital sex are no more likely to be  depressed than those who do not.

http://www.springerlink.com/content/781t64k88827q673/

This seems to be just another case of fundies making stuff up to fit their own agenda.

Also, what the hell does “Virgins who wait … have a higher success rate” mean? And why did they add all the other words in there when a rhyme is much more likely to stick in someone’s mind?

 People only “regret” things that happened before marriage precisely BECAUSE it is drilled into us so hard that we “should” be absolutely virginal.

Could anyone else figure out why the purity bear was a sassy black woman?

It’s worth contrasting the “purity bear” approach  promoting virginity until marriage with Unitarian Universalist minister Rev. Debra Haffner’s approach:

In fact, I believe that sexual compatibility is so important in a marriage that I won’t perform a wedding for a couple that has only engaged in the least intimate sexual behaviors. In my time as ordained clergy, I have never performed a wedding for a couple who isn’t already cohabitating.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/rev-debra-haffner/non-virgins-need-not-appl_b_612326.html

Prior to seminary and ordination as a minister, Debra’s professional background was public health and sexuality education.

My vagina is a pizza? lol
Sweetheart, your sex isn’t a limited use consumable, in fact it levels up with you! ^_~

Guy in car: Drat! My cardigan failed to seduce her! Perhaps…a sweater-vest…

Okay, the whole idea of promising sex to a stuffed toy is just indescribably creepy to me. Making a promise to or “on” a stuffed animal is something a child would do, and to have teens and/or adults doing it smacks not only of a pedophelic mindset, but also something else really creepy that we’ve noticed living near Liberty University:

You are not a citizen, you are not an adult, you are not mature, you are nothing…until the day you are married and have sex. You become an entirely different class of citizen, you are instantly respectable, you instantly have authority over your peers, you instantly have special privileges the unmarried to not have (lots of them, actually), you instantly become someone you were not only moments before. All because a penis found a vagina (seriously, you can almost hear the bells ringing and a hallelujah choir in the background when they talk bout this, and they’ll say flat out that they are “better,” and “more mature” than their unmarried, celibate peers).  It’s so bad that there’s actually something that those who don’t attend Liberty call “ring before spring,” which is the insane push to get engaged before March so you can get married in the same summer. The belief being that if you “wait too long” you might slip up and make the “mistake” of having sex! Better to be married, even if you don’t particularly like the person, to stave off the temptation of sin, and to acquire the status and privilege you cannot otherwise attain.

If you haven’t witnessed it first-hand, it’s really tough to understand; but, for people so focused on purity, they place an awful lot of their importance on sex. Obviously, it’s a way to 1) control people and 2)encourage marriage. Watching married people here is what I imagine watching royalty in the Middle Ages must’ve looked like: smug, superior-feeling people condescending to give a nod, or perhaps some sage advice, to those beneath them that have no achieved this exalted state.  They day after their wedding,  suddenly they’re they advice givers about all matters sexual and reproductive to their friends. Those who aren’t married (and therefore who have not, in theory, had sex yet) are still viewed as children, as immature, as not ready to accept the responsibilities of adults. And hence, the stuffed animal is–in their minds–entirely appropriate.

Of course, in my mind it’s just squicky.

Gotta love statistics quoted with no source reference. I especially like the “more likely to suffer depression” one. Assuming there’s any truth to that statistic, could the problem possibly be with the sample? How many men never have sex before they’re married? Those virgins couldn’t possibly also fail to ever be diagnosed with depression because they take all their problems to church instead, could they? And the language is wrong. It says “outside of marriage”, so does it include infidelity?

If there’s one thing that burns my britches, it’s the misuse of statistics.

So not believable, I mean c’mon, he drives a ruby red edge with a stuffed on the center console.  Now if the bear were in the back seat, well, then we are talking!!

Wait, this isn’t a joke?

Part of the reason sexual purity laws have always applied more strictly to women than men has to do with property and inheritance, which was patrilineal in most cultures.  Maternity is self-evident, but paternity is not.  Going on Maury for a free paternity test wasn’t an option, so a man had to rely on sexual isolation of his women to make sure his heirs were really his heirs.  Wrapping those rules in a blanket of “God said so” helped with enforcement.

And you’re right; the concept of purity does reduce women to mere property.  The less tainted the vessel for your future progeny is, the more value it has.

I have to say that the majority of women I know didn’t really enjoy their first experience of intercourse and feel like they should have waited.  Not me!  I’m a 33%er, too.  I had also just turned 18 and know a lot of women who were 14-16.  These women don’t regret not waiting until they were married.  They just wish they had been a bit older.

I haven’t regretted anything yet. Oh I’ve regretted one or two of the people  (and making mistakes is what being young is all about) but never the choice to have sex. In fact I’m getting ready to live with someone I have sex with and have no plans to marry in the foreseeable future.

Copyright holders are the only ones who can send DMCA takedown notices. You would need to tip off whichever recording company has the rights to the Supremes’ music.

Maybe they should just “date” online until they decide to marry.  No chance of losing their “purity” that way, and it’s far cheaper too.  No creepy bear needed. 

My first time was pretty awesome, but I was 18 and out of high school. I had also done other stuff in high school, so that’s probably why it didn’t hurt and actually felt good my first time. I have a friend who just recently had sex the first time with her boyfriend. Up until now I always thought she was asexual, because that’s kind of how she described herself. She said it hurt a lot, but they also never did any type of foreplay and she has never had any sexual experience before then.

I know what you mean. While I was deconverting I still worked at a church nursery. Aside from a few high school volunteers, I was the youngest worker there. The other women were all married or used to be married (most of them had children). If they made a veiled comment about sex they would look at me and say something like “You’re too young to know that” even when they were only one or two years older than I. To make matters worse, I was not a virgin. One or two of the other women I worked with knew this because we were friends, but my boss didn’t know and the parents of the children didn’t know. In fact one Sunday I got sick in the restroom and when I went to talk to my boss about it the children’s pastor was there and he jokingly said,”Maybe you’re pregnant.” My boss laughed and said, “oh you know that’s not possible.” That ironic thing was that I had been late that month…turned out to be the flu though. They act like being married (and by extension experiencing sex) was the most mature and awesome thing anyone could do, but on the other hand, if they knew I was having sex (or that I’m bisexual) I would have been chased out of there.

 “Also, “I feel like we really got to know each other” sounds like
something you say on a first or second date. If that’s true, you DO NOT
follow that up with “I love you.” RED FLAG! You don’t need a freaky
bear to tell you to stay away from anyone who does that.”

Yes, didn’t we learn that from the first episode of “How I met Your Mother”? Don’t these people listen to the public service announcements given by our generous cable networks?

 On the other hand, Ted turned out to be an okay guy. On the other other hand, Ted is a fictional character.