What Are Those Candles For…? November 17, 2011

What Are Those Candles For…?

Adding to the list of things Catholics don’t know about their own religion…

(via The Onion)

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  • When I was a good little baptist, my first grade teacher used to go on rants about Catholics and their evil, demon-inspired candle rituals… 

  • Newavocation

    Hey, if it was about knowing instead of doing what your told or playing follow the leader, I imagine those churches would be pretty empty.

  • Fire pretty

    that’s why

  • Anonymous

    Mostly people do it so they feel better about themselves. Especially if candles are lit for dead people. The exact religious purpose isn’t really that important

  • JenL

    Gotta love The Onion…

  • Anonymous

    There are no real stories on this subject, so we have to mine The Onion?

  • Ronramrod8

    “everybody does it”

  • Annie

    While growing up catholic, it always irked me that the advent candles consisted of three purple and one pink candle (or was it three pink and one purple?).  I felt an even two and two would have made a much prettier display. 

  • starskeptic

    I agree – a fake news story proves what?

  • It’s a joke. It’s supposed to be funny, not news reporting. 

  • Annie

    That we can take a few minutes to laugh every once in a while. 

  • There’s gotta be a reason for the colors.
    You forgot what the nuns taught you? Already?

  • Candles belong on birthday cakes.

  • Annie

    You’re right.  I just googled the significance and it is chock full of circular logic… typical.  It’s 3 purple and one pink ( purple= hope, purple = preparation, pink= joy, and purple = love). 

  • Thanks. It won’t keep me up tonight.

  • Another Onion title (that tore me up)

    “Bodybuilder Can’t Believe He Forgot to Develop Right Arm”

  • PJB863

    When I was a kid growing up catholic, it was cool because it was the one time you were allowed to play with fire. 

    Otherwise, I wasn’t allowed to have matches until I was 14 and had to wait until I was 16 until they let me near any sharp objects.  When I was 17, they took the sharp objects away.  I’m 51 now, and they still don’t let me have anything sharp.

  • starskeptic

    um…I GET the Onion, folks – 
    but Hemant’s use of this as a heading:
    “Adding to the list of things Catholics don’t know about their own religion…” – to seemingly add, as fodder, to his previous item :
    “Survey Says Catholics Are Becoming Less Catholic”has NOTHING to do with the picture as presented by the Onion – it’s exactly like the using of a non-existent Jefferson quote  to say “see – those theists just don’t get it”
    on Onion: funny!
    here (as used): NOT funny!

  • Charles Black

    Its stories like these that make me think that people only identify with religion out of tradition, not because they really follow the religion in question.

  • Drew Bentley

    So, get your own blog and put whatever you want on it then. No reason to be so up tight about what Hemant posts here and what he and others might think is funny. 

  • Ed L

    If you’re in a Catholic church and you light a votive candle you’re supposed to put some cash in the adjacent box. If you don’t the magic doesn’t work.

  • starskeptic

    …no reason for you to be an a**hole by implying someone should just shut up because they don’t agree with you; that’s how the other side behaves…

  • I always thought it was kind of like burning incense- send those prayers to heaven in the convection current.
    Anyway, I love the smell of beeswax candles and the way they shed a soft glow on old cathedral walls. 

  • Mhm. I don’t see anything funny about that picture nor any connection to the title of the blog entry…

  • Anonymous

    It’s not a story, it’s a joke (albeit not a very funny one).

  • Oh the incense. I need to get some of that for my house. I really always liked its scent.

  • Anonymous

    Not all religion maybe, but it’s especially true for a lot of Catholics. Not a bad thing really. I’d rather they follow it out of tradition than true conviction

  • Stogoe

    Shorter starkeptic: “I am aware of all internet traditions.”

  • Cameron

    The point is that to somebody who doesn’t come here often (like me) it looks like the blog author doesn’t understand that The Onion is a humour website.

  • starskeptic

    …exactly my point, thank you Cameron!..

  • starskeptic

    longer Stogoe: “I can use an oxymoron to put words in someone’s mouth without even knowing what an ‘oxymoron’ is.” 

  • That’s enough of a reason for me!

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