If you choose to remain a virgin until you’re married, that’s your decision and that’s fine. You don’t need to sign a contract saying so.
But the whole conservative Christian notion of getting young women (some as young as six) to wear a Purity Ring and pledge to their fathers that they’ll remain abstinent until after they walk down the aisle is disgraceful.
Libby Anne was one of those young women and she remembers taking her own purity vows:
I promised my father at 13 that I would remain a virgin until marriage. What did I know at 13? I promised my father at 17 that I would never marry against his wishes. What did I know, a sheltered 17-year-old who had seen nothing at all of the world outside? It was foolish of me to assume that I would never change, that I would remain frozen for life where I was at 17. My parents did their best to hold me to these promises and didn’t see a problem with this. Were they as naive as I?
I wish I’d never made those sorts of foolish promises. The result was only heartache. When I grew past my teenage opinions, I had to deal with the guilt of broken promises, but I also had to deal with my parents’ sense of betrayal because I had broken the promises I made them. The thing is, the promises that were broken were promises I had no business making. But I was a sheltered and naive adolescent, so it’s not surprising that I didn’t know any better. The problem, though, is that the organizations and individual parents of Christian Patriarchy encourage girls to make these sorts of promises. Children may not know better, but adults should.
Unless they’re completely brainwashed into thinking that any romantic relationship that doesn’t end in marriage is inherently evil… (anyone else wondering how many of these parents remained virgins before marriage?)
You can read examples of this disturbing practice still taking place on Libby Anne’s site. If you weren’t raised in the culture or you haven’t read up on it, prepared to be disturbed.
