I’ve never watched (or cared to watch) a NASCAR race in my life, and I couldn’t care less about a pre-race prayer… but somehow, when Pastor Joe Nelms said the invocation before the Nationwide Federated Auto Parts 300, I couldn’t help but smile:
Heavenly Father, we thank you tonight for all your blessings. You said in all things, give thanks. So we want to thank you tonight for these mighty machines that you’ve brought before us. Thank you for the Dodges and the Toyotas. Thank you for the Fords and, most of all, we thank you for Roush and Yates partnering to give us the power we see before us tonight. Thank you for GM Performance Technology and the RO7 engines. Thank you for Sunoco Racing fuel and Goodyear tires that bring performance and power to the track. Lord, I want to thank you for my smokin’ hot wife tonight, Lisa, my two children Eli and Emma, or as we like to call them, the little E’s. Lord, I pray and bless the drivers and use them tonight. May they put on a performance worthy of this great track. In Jesus’ name, boogity, boogity, boogity, Amen!
The “smokin’ hot wife” bit was from Talladega Nights while the “boogity” bit was a reference to famed driver and announcer Darrell Waltrip.
Alright, you can all go back to ignoring NASCAR now.