What Should My Sign Say…?

“I could go either way”

this is what lowercase looks like

[Citation needed]

“The guy behind me can’t see because of this sign” or simply “The guy behind me can’t see”

No, no, obviously it needs to say:

“SPELLCHECK IS YOUR FREIND”

I like Adam’s.

Here’s mine:

We’re the militant middle, and we vote!

You can’t steal my sign: “We’re not in the desert any more, Abraham.”

It’s not as good as my old “Cthulhu Hates Chordates”, but I’m pleased with it.

Not sure if this is the venue, but “Jesus was a communist” is always a good one.

How about “My arms are getting tired” Or “I like your shirt/pants” Or perhaps “Don’t harsh my mellow”

How about something mathy? I’m fond of:

e^(i pi) – 1 = 0

“I’m reasonably upset and I’m not going to be complacent anymore!”

“Give me liberty or give me Canadian citizenship.”

“When I receive new information, I rethink my position. What do YOU do?” (Keynes paraphrase)

“I’m a wishy-washy flip-flopper because I’m clean and casual.”

“I’m on the fence so I can see better.”

“My arms hurt.” or “I Support this Sign.”

“Apathy is a careless endeavor.”

“One Nation, Understand?”

Okay, I’m done.

“I Support a Market Place of Ideas, Who Wants to Buy Mine?”

“My frackin teeth hurt!”

-George Washington-

Important Issues
Don’t Fit On Signs.

Kiss me I’m Irish
Spellcheck is your fiend
I’m up for a double-entendre
Does this sign make me look fat?

“I’m not crazy about paying taxes, but I do like having sewers.”

AGREED!!! Originally said by Jon Stewart when asked what the rally was all about and who would be there.

Karen

BTW..I am sooo jealous! Wish we could go.

“I disagree with that sign over there ->”

“You’re probably right. I’m so sorry.”

(Draw Venn Diagram: label one side “my opinion” and the other “your opinion” and then in the middle, “what you said.”)

“What you said just now sort of makes sense, I guess.”

“It’s okay if we disagree.”

“I disagree, but I’m completely ignorant on the topic.”

“I HAVE A SIGN.”

Or

“THAT’S A PRETTY NICE SIGN YOU’VE GOT.”

Or

“WAFFLES ARE DELICIOUS.”

This rally gives reason to my fear

I’m an Atheist, not a douche bag.

I’m terrified of unreasonableness.

I like pie.

I’m glad I don’t have any friends or I wouldn’t be able to do this.

I don’t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it. (I know, it’s old.)

My other sign is a billboard.

Why can’t we be friends?

Hey baby, what’s your sign?

Why am I here?

God hears all prayers.
He asks that you shut up & just do it by yourself!

or

The END is nearer!

I like:

this is what lowercase looks like by Deiloh

&

is this the unemployment line? by Hangnail

For the March to restore Sanity:

I’m sane as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore!

“I LIKE SHARPIES!”

“My other sign is a real life!”

“Look at me!!! Look at me!!!”

“Yelling, screaming, misspelled insult!”

“I am lost”

“A sign of humanity”

“I want my country back, so we all can get ahead.”

“If you can read this you are too smart for this rally.”

“A sign of intellence”

“There was nothing on TV, so I decided to come here.”

“Smaller government! Most politicians are way too tall.”

Where’s Glenn Beck?

Tea Party:Patriotism::Shut The Fuck Up!: You’re Mom
Creationism:Science::Poison:Lunch

“Allahu Akbar or not”

OBAMA IS A CACTUS!!!

In response to Glenn Beck’s comment at his rally that “America today begins to turn back to God”, I suggest something like “Turn Back To Compassion”.

“Give Me Reasonable, Rational Solutions Or Give Me Death!”

“Reasonable People Rise Up!”

“Fear Fails, Reason Prevails!”

“Colbert Is A Fascist Nazi Hitler Nazi!”

And I love Secular Stu’s suggestions also. I need a love button.

Fire Stations are Socialism (and that is okay).

Along the line of what Scythe said but a little different. A picture of Hitler that says “Hitler was a Nazi”.

The standard yellow smiley face with “Have a nice day” would be too.

And finally:
“m’eh”

Guilt, fear, and mass insanity.
Three cheers for Christianity.

“This sign intentionally left blank.”

“nuke the feminist unborn gay whale mothers against drunk driving for christ”

On the Simpsons, the “protesters” were whistling and one held a sign, “Everything is fine.”
I’d hold up a sign at Colbert’s rally, “You are America and so did I!”
There’s no denying it.

“Intolerance will not be tolerated.”

“Oh boy is this great!!!”
-Flounder

Or

UPSIDE DOWN (hold sign upside down)

My two cents…

Wise man say, forgiveness is divine but never pay full price for late pizza.

Insert witty remark here.

Not Gay (but I’d totally do Jon Stewart)

Where is Jesus’s Birth Certificate?

If you can’t say anything nice, at least try to be noisy.

Don’t panic.

In Search of Jefferson’s America

Hi, MOM!

We are planning to be there, and are planning to rendezvous with, at the minimum, another Pastafarian or two. Maybe more. There is a smaller monument just to the north of the Monument grounds, right across the street, with a big flamey sword. I had suggested that as a nearby place to meet. There are no really good landmarks on the Monument Grounds except the Monument itself, which is not a good meeting place. The Old Post Office is a bit of a walk, the food court at the Reagan Building is closer if you are looking for someplace indoors to meet up.

And Hemant, have you been lurking on the forums at Venganza? (And if you haven’t, why not?) Because I had already asked for sign ideas, and here you go getting me a shipload. Thanks!

Also, how are you arriving? If you are flying in to Dulles, we could give you a lift, at least as far as the subway station.

Obama’s a Secret American
Thinking is Free
No Fear
A Sign of Reason
Calm the F**k Down!
Enlightenment: It’s Taking A While, But We’ll Get There [or, Over 300 Years and Counting]

Keep government in my insurance-I want to afford it.

REASON BEING…

REFUND?!?!

86 WOO

“Excuse me, I have nothing to say.” – George Carlin.

“I knew I shoulda taken that left turn at Albuquerque.” – Bugs Bunny

How about a “secret” message like, “The Mongoose sleeps in pajama bottoms.”

Up with Mini Skirts!

Question Authority! And That’s An Order!

All men are created equal – The most socialist phrase ever written.

Does anyone in this country know that you need boiling water to make a good cup of tea?

Jesus, and by Jesus I mean the figure venerated as the son of the Jewish god by those that adhere to the Christian faith and recognized by the Islamic faith as a prophet, not the guy that does your lawn, is a socialist.

Elections, sometimes they suck.

Leaf Tea is better.

Look! Boobies! {printed over a picture of the seabirds of the same name}

SIGN, SIGN, EVERYWHERE A SIGN

I’m not racist

I had a couple of ideas. Enjoy:

“Son Of An Ape.”

“Hey Glenn Beck, Progressives Paid For Your Library!”

“Godwin’s Law. Your Argument Is Invalid.”

“The Tea Party is Made of Junk DNA.”

“I Love Lamp!”

“Three Words That Will Fix The Economy: Gay Bridal Registry.”

“Still Waiting For Change.”

And one that I think everyone can get behind:

“Jon Stewart For President.”

Have a blast.

“I Have a Sign And You Don’t!”
or
“Don’t Hate Me Cause I’m Atheist…
Hate Me Cause I’m Beautiful!”
or
“Sign? What Sign? This Isn’t a Sign.”
or
“I Know My Parents Weren’t Glass Makers, and No I Won’t Move!”
or
“Here Kitty Kitty”

The nature of Monkey was irrepressible.

or

Stop looking at me.

“I HAVE A SIGN!”

THEY SAID THERE WOULD BE COFFEE!

“when did comedians become the sane ones?”

“I’m too apathetic to be part of this rally”

“Jon Stewart is god”

“I’m Hemant and so is my wife”

“Why are we holding these placards?”

“Careful Now” (Father Ted)
Or
“Just goes to show, you can’t be too careful” (David Mitchell I think)

Yay! I can participate this time! I’m going to flex my very small photoshop muscles…

My contribution is this.

And Richard Wade, Hemant is a mathematician, so it should be “Here’s looking at Euclid”.

Put a picture of Waldo (Where’s Waldo?) on it.

“Don’t believe everything you read on a sign.”

“Hi, Mom!”?

“Open your mind (but don’t let your brain fall out)”
“Question everything – especially this sign”
“Question everything – especially me”
“Always consider the other side as well” (on both sides of the sign, of course)
“I’m willing to be convinced”
“The Cake is a Lie” (can’t believe I’m the first here to suggest this one)
“Non Sequitur”
“This sign does not contain a logical fallacy”
“The Dictionary Is A Good Book Too”
“Is this the right place for an argument?”
“I don’t know where we’re going either”
“Trying to stay sane while offline”

And finally:
“Sorry, couldn’t come up with a wittier sign”

Okay, I’ll go for silly ones…

“You can’t get laid back without getting laid first!”

“This space for rent.”

“Are you paying too much for your car insurance?”

(Although that one might be a U.K. only reference I suppose…)

“My other sign’s a bumper sticker.”

“Do you know this man?”

“Where do I sign?”

“I have trouble writing the letter .”

My late father, who worked for a newspaper, used to have a rubber stamp the read “You may be right.”
When he received a letter to the editor that was too batshit to publish, he would stamp it and send it back to the writer.

“FREE CTHULHU*!
*with purchase of second Cthulhu of equal or greater value”

“I LIKE MY WOMEN LIKE I LIKE MY COFFEE”
(To which the only natural response is ‘Covered with bees!’)

Or, if you’d rather go with a more classical reference (to Rene Magritte), “CE N’EST PAS UN SIGNE”

Considering the date, maybe a Halloween theme?

I believe…in the Great Pumpkin.

or

I like Halloween candy, and I bet you do too.

Fantasic ideas for signs in the comments. I don’t envy Hemant having to pick just one. Here are a few more to make it more difficult:

“Sanity is IN”
“Where’s the organic, free-range beef?”
“What part of friendly didn’t you get?”
“Rationality is catching”
“You don’t scare me, pal – look over there!”
“Sign of things to come”
“Will reason for food”
“I like pi”
“No shoes, no shirt, no services”
“Hah, made you look!”
“If you can read this sign…congratulations”
“This is a blank sign”
“Give me freedom or give me fermat”
“Can you believe those other signs?!”
“Mind the gap”
“Yes, I am that good looking”
“Open minds fill empty lives”

This is fun, but I should do some real work just to keep in practice.

To pander to the blogger…

“MATH PROVES INTELLIGENT 2-D SINE”
(with accompanying wave sketch)

Of course, since I’m not a mathematician, that may just look stupid instead of punny.

“SOMETHING ABOUT TAXES!!”
“PICKLES GIVE ME GAS”

note: all caps are not required, but everyone knows a good protest sign contains at least one all caps word.

I really wish I could go to this event. If anyone is still looking for a good protest sign idea, I think I have a winner.

Get yourself one of those little BBQ’s, an apron, a spatula, and some holy books. Just sit there, BBQing the Kora, Bible, or any other dogma.

“I’m really happy for you and i’ma let you finish, but!”

“I like cheese”

There was a kid with that sign at the protests for Farenheit 911 at my local theater a few years back. I thought it was very funny.

WILL SPREAD FEAR FOR FOOD.

For the Colbert rally — “Obama is a secret grizzly.”

A picture of Samuel Jackson
“Unless you are him, you shouldn’t shout.”

More controversial: A picture of Hitler.
“This is Hitler, any questions?”

For the Colbert rally, I’m going with a plain and simple “BOO!”

In big letters:

THIS SIGN IS TOO SMA

Don’t read this sign.

I’m not INsane. I’m totally out of it.

You just lost the game.

There’s nothing to fear but losing fear.

STFU

I don’t vote, and I vote.

Ask me about my blog.

I’d say “Eat more chickn” or however they spell it, but you’re a vegetarian.

“Grammar are important”

My daughter torments my son with “You just lost the game” every chance she gets.

I also like Sock’s homage to Princess Bride:
“Patriotism, you keep using that word, I don’t think it means what you think it means.”

My contribution: Draw a chalkboard and write: One nation indivisble

“I cannot tolerate intolerance”

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

How about a more personal joke like:

THIS RALLY JUST GOT MEHTA

How about:

I BELIEVE THAT _________
BUT I AM OPEN TO HEARING AND DISCUSSING EVIDENCE TO THE CONTRARY

(Fill in the blank with whatever you want. For an atheist-theme, “THERE IS NO GOD” would be appropriate.)

Where’s the nearest port-a-potty?

So far I’ve seen two variations of this one:

“Intolerant of the Intolerant”

I’ve had this printed on my checks before.
I’ll be using it, so sorry Hemant.

I’m reasonably certain that your position is valid, and I would like to discuss it with you over drinks!

Die Gedanken Sind Frei

My other sign is witty

We’re here, we’re reasonable, and we’d appreciate it if you could accept that peacefully!

*This space intentionally left blank*

I wonder whats on TV?

Hitler was a Nazi! (complete with cheesy mustache drawing)

Glenn Beck seems like a nice, misguided bloke in need of a hug and perhaps some prozac!

Would you like to pet my monkey? (helpful if you had a stuffed monkey to carry around)

“Gorbachev sings tractors! Turnip! Buttocks!”

(A Bloom County reference from the 80s)

Ok, let’s proportion our belief to the evidence.

I especially like [citation needed]

and

YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX!!

“Did I hear someone say ‘Donuts'”

“Freebird!!!”

E pluribus unum

Greetings,

I am a member of the University of Georgia’s atheist group, a service oriented student body, and will be attending the October 30th rallies in DC. The Natural History museum abuts the National Mall and would be, in my estimation, an appropriate place for us atheists to make camp. Additionally, the museum is near many restaurants and a few coffee shops in the event that someone, or someones, wanted to retire for a coffee and food. Cheers!

-I was mad ’til I checked the facts.
-Restore Raisin
-No foxnews is good news
-Boycott fear mongers (network logos?)
-“When facism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.” — Sinclair Lewis (?)
-I was mad ’til I stopped watching the news.
-The old deities aren’t working, let’s make (or make up) some new ones.
-I can no longer decide who is more wrong.
-“…the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion…” Treaty of Tripoli 1797
-Willful ignorance is still ignorance
-Wishful thinking is the substance of things hoped for
-It is only by faith that we may be fooled
-Keep Jefferson in the text books
-Texas School Board, America is ashamed of you
-Stop shouting… um, please?
GOD HATES CRABS (leviticus 11:12)
-Speak up, just a little.
-No Pot? No Tea Party.
-Want to lose my vote? Try to scare me.
-I have unqualified unreasonable belief in you.
-Remind me what you mean by “fact.”
-Hey Mister, you forgot your sign.
-He was all like “Yahweh!” and I was like “No way.”
-He who is least of my brothers doesn’t have a lobby.
-Turnover now, preferably apple
-Who do you have to blow to get press credentials?
-I can’t picture mohamed here. Can you draw him?
(alternative)
-DRAW ~blank vertical space~ MOHAMED
-Are ya gettin’ this, camera guy?
-Thanks to Bush I can watch foxnews 24/7
-Thanks to Bush I didn’t have to miss work today.
-No reasonable person ever called me “heathen”
-Without fear and anger how will I rant?
-Prayer not working? Sacrifice a goat… or kid.

If you choose to March to Keep Fear Alive perhaps you could go with…

Don’t Abort Your Fears!

Adopt Mine.

Try this one:

Side One: Sarah Palin is a Bear (with a picture of a Grizzly with glasses.)

Side Two: Sarah Palin is Bare (Picture with a plain bear)

Now momma grizzly already claims to be a bear and we know bears are the most terrifying thing in the world (according to Stephen)

A tweak worth further consideration; by knocking down the font size on ‘…with people who have no sense of humor or justice’ the ‘I love screwing’ becomes more prominent, which from a glance/distance commands more attention, and in turn within itself is an act of ‘screwing with people’. 😉 http://i141.photobucket.com/albums/r58/zippizoo_photo/love-screwing-with-people–aristole-muse.gif

I understand why you didn’t want to carry the “Do Ask” sign. I’m quite happy as runner up. But I am understandably curious. Who’s banner will you be showing in DC?

That is still to be decided. There are a number of them I thought were hilarious or poignant as well as relevant to me 🙂

Moderation is the new absolutism–definitely

I have half a mind to ….. cheer Glenn Beck

Cooling it is the new patriotism

Dogma is a bitch.

Respect the Sanctity of Doubt.

Jesus was a Jew so why aren’t you?

Reasons Greetings!

Man is good, Man is great.