Crazy Christian icon Pat Robertson said that Haiti experienced a horrific earthquake because Haitian slaves once “swore a pact with the devil.”
The Onion informs us of his explanations for other terrible tragedies:

It’s funny… until you realize that he’s on the air because millions of people take him completely seriously.
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."
It’s Moving Day for the Friendly ..."