Most Godless Atheist of 2009? January 3, 2010

Most Godless Atheist of 2009?

Well, shit, if everyone’s putting up year-end polls and getting 29821313 visitors and PZ‘s getting tons of votes even when he’s not on the list, I might as well join in on the fun:

I wonder who will win…

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  • Jeff Dale

    Technically, all humans are equally godless.

  • Jim H

    My vote for PZ just tied him with the rest of the universe, 27-27. Go PZ!

    While @Jeff Dale is technically correct, where’s the humor in that?

  • OK, so this is the first poll that made me laugh quite this hard.

    But you do see that he’s GOT to win this one. Even if it doesn’t get pharyngulated, he’s just the objectively true answer. Because: how do you combine everyone in the universe?

    Option 1: you add them. In that case, you will be adding lots of (smaller, larger, medium-sized) bits of belief to weigh against his unbelief. Ergo: he wins.

    Option 2: you average them. In that case even the smallest bits of belief will still make the average larger than his zero. Ergo, he wins again.

    Oh wait: Option 3 is in the first comment! The objective option: all humans are equally godless. But you can’t have had it in mind because it’s not in the poll.

    You’re the math teacher: among the many options I’ve doubtlessly missed, any that make him a sure loser?

    That said, you WERE being very brave taking on PZ in an online poll… Hats off to you, and a very very deep bow.

  • Twewi

    Next poll: Which is the most digital computer?

  • Brian Macker

    Jeff Dale,

    Yes but everybody else counts a whole lot more than Myers. So I voted for the godlessness of everyone else.

  • Brian Macker


    Your logic fails on the fact that there are hundreds of gods that don’t exist.Therefore, every single person is an atheist with everyone in fact absolutely and utterly godless as Jeff Dale pointed out. The sums are always additive, and therefore Myers loses. 😉

  • The phrase “most godless” seems to imply that by “godless” we mean something positive.

    Are theists less than zero?

  • Jeff Dale

    The phrase “most godless” seems to imply that by “godless” we mean something positive.
    Are theists less than zero?

    No, theists are just as godless as atheists. They just don’t realize it, or don’t want to believe it.

  • 🙁
    Hemant, I don’t think your poll is having the intended effect..

  • Just you wait, Kaleena. Just you wait…

  • Brian, Bill’s got it right: you’re counting as if godlessness was stuff. It’s non-stuff. So if on the one hand you don’t have the stuff of religion, and on the other you do, the no-stuff side wins the godlessness poll 🙂

    Adding more gods is colourful and interesting, but does not change the basic math. PZ has none of them, and many people in the universe have some of them.

    But hey, I’m not the math person here. Any other ideas?

  • Capt Sasquatch


    You say that many people have some of them, but since no god(s) exist, everybody has none of them.

    As Jeff Dale points out, everyone is godless, but not all of them realize/believe it.

  • Janine, She Wolf Of Pharyngula, OM

    You have to love a silly and pointless poll that was set up just to be pharyngulated.

  • Since “everyone else in the universe” is neither singular (“who is”) nor atheist (there’s a few billion non-atheists at least), there is only one legitimate choice there, PZ.

    Now, if you’d said anyone else in the universe, I might have picked that option.

  • Dan

    Go PZ! Show that pesky human race who’s godless!

  • Revyloution

    Cute and funny, but it would have been cuter and funnier if you had a poll asking the same question but with just PZ on the ballot.

    In communist Russia, the vote picks you.

  • Cute and funny, but it would have been cuter and funnier if you had a poll asking the same question but with just PZ on the ballot.

    Tried to do that, but they made me put down two choices for the poll!

  • Fascists!

    (The ones who wanted more than one candidate, that is. Nitpicking pedants.)

  • MJT

    PZ is obviously the correct choice. It would be more difficult if the alternative were “every other godless atheist in the universe combined”. As it is, the only rational choice is to vote for PZ.

  • Marconi

    Damn, I wanted to vote for Antony Flew.

  • Biology Blogger

    PZ shall prevail!

    Professional Pharyngulater

  • If it’s any consolation, Hemant, I voted for you in the “Most Vocal Atheist” poll. 🙂

  • Bjarni

    Shouldn’t the options be:

    1)PZ Myers
    2)PZ Meyers

    I keep hearing about this ‘Meyers’ guy, so he must be pretty godless.

  • Tnemmoc

    How long until another poll surfaces with these two options to the same question above:

    a) Not PZ.

    b) Still not PZ.

  • Samia Says:
    …how do you combine everyone in the universe?

    First, get a really big blender…

  • I voted for PZ just to turn up the heat on him a bit.

  • ‘Tis Himself

    I didn’t see an “all of the above” choice. Because that’s what I would have chosen.

  • MadScientist

    Ah, a “less-holy-than-thou” contest. 🙂 Now why do the godless have such contests rather than the “holier-than-the-rest-of-you” contests of many religious sects?

  • Strangel

    Well, these polls have done some good; I now know who you are and will be following you on a regular basis! Now don’t ya feel better?

  • orion

    Am I the only one who understands that ‘godless atheist’ is a tautology? Or is everyone else so clever and subtleties are lost on me?

  • JohnnieCanuck


    Next time I come across one of those agnostic vs. atheist discussions I am going to get some use out of that phrase.
    Clearly Hemant has found a way to punch his visitor numbers up.

  • I voted “Everyone else… ” Because that everyone else includes me, and I’m 100% godless; you can’t be more than that, so alone, I balance out PZ. Add the rest of us to that, and we’ve left PZ in the dust.

  • Carlie

    How about “Which of the following is the best choice: PZ Myers, cake, or death?”

  • Anonymous

    PZ. ‘Everyone else in the universe combined’ is not an atheist.

  • Joffan

    Why isn’t “God” an option in this poll?

    PZ would probably still win though.

  • Vene

    I considered trying to analyze this question, then I decided to vote for PZ being I am a mindless Pharyngulite minion.

  • David

    Nothing against P.Z. but I am pretty god damned godless, It is not rational that he is more godless than rest of the godless people, which is becoming a very large minority. I get that it is a joke about how powerful his blog is at decimating useless polls, but still. Give us millions of atheists a little credit.

  • Onotheo

    I like this poll.

  • MoeLarryAndJesus

    I voted for PZ because he is to atheism what Spider-man is to spider-powered superheroes.

  • poopy mcjones

    atheism is not merely a negative implying the lack of belief in deity. In as much as atheism posits a lack of belief in deity, atheism is as much the positive recognition of our human facility for deification, or the mystification of the mundanely mythological, and the awareness of falsehood, untruth and logical fallacy. Atheism implies no ethical conclusions, in fact, quite the contrary, atheism rightly acknowledges in its capacity for recognizing untruth that moralizing dichotomies are false constructs of arithmetic, language and music. Albeit useful tools for critical analysis, the suppositional speculations of ethics are entirely illusory…

  • PZ’s pretty godless.

  • there must a new fancy way to describe that much godlessness.

  • CodeMonkey

    Pharyngulated officially:

    Pharyngula Blog Post

  • Samia: another possibility is that strong atheists (those who make a positive assertion that there are no gods) are negative, while weak atheists (those who merely fail to assert that there are any gods) count for zero. So if you add up all of the strong atheists in the universe, you’re bound to get a number far smaller than PZ’s 0 or -10 or whatever he is.

  • Lord Zero


    Enough said.

  • Good one, arensb!

    Capt Sasquatch : you are right of course, but as Jim H said right in the beginning, where’s the fun in that?

    About the poll, if you are seriously trying to set up a good pharyngulite match, you may want to consider pitting PZ against Cthulhu in the next one. But even then…and the question might have to be different too…

  • Hemant is chuckling, PZ is LOLing, a lot of light hearted philosophical banter is taking place – admittedly some of it pseudo, and I get to plug ‘the convention’ another link with my comment. Kaleena, I think this poll is having exactly the desired effect!

  • Wait wait wait, picky grammaticians! Let’s look at this rationally. “Everyone else” is singular, mind bending as that might be.
    So “Everyone else is having a good day.” Singular. The mathematician wins, ultimately. After all, one wouldn’t say “Everyone else are having good days” while sounding serious.

    [Hemant-sensei counts in “everyone else”]

  • This poll is hilarious. It made my day! Looks like PZ beats us all out! LOL

  • Jonn Mero

    Pretty daft way of putting it. If you’re a total atheist there is 100% godlessness, but you can’t get more than that. Total vacuum is total vacuum, there is nothing more to suck out.
    Most prominent internet atheist around, PZ = yes. But most godlessy, is that the one who blasphemes the most?

  • djlactin

    I figger every other atheist deserves at least half a vote; roughly estimating our total at 0.1*6 billion, that’s er a large number. Gonna take me a long time to de-pharyngulate this poll.

  • milspecs

    Umm… cake please.

  • rofl. Definitely voted for PZ.

  • tsig

    You should have matched PZ against bacon. Everyone likes bacon.

  • jimmy paravane

    wuss. If you want real man hits, you should’ve done a poll on who the sexiest godless atheist is.(grin)

  • U funny. With love from the Horde.

  • Brigand

    I’ve never met a pointless poll I didn’t feel the compulsion to vote in. So here goes! Go PZ, go!!

  • MikeMa

    Got to give in to fate I guess. PZ it is! I guess I do not understand all the hand-wringing and philosophy. It’s just an internet poll. Not a whole lot to think about or ponder here!

  • DC

    How does one measure degrees in non-belief?

    What makes me not believing in something less non-beliefist than someone else not believing in something?

    And for the record, I voted for the rest of the universe. It’s the rational and reasoned choice. 🙂

  • Dan W

    I voted for PZ for the lulz. 😛

  • muggle

    PleaZ. Everyone else. No way in hell is that guy more godless than I am so I have to vote everyone else.

    I’ve clicked on his blog a couple of times, mostly because it was linked somewhere. It’s okay but I haven’t even been impressed enough to read it on a regular basis. Too boring. Why is everyone raving?

    Shrug. To each his own. But, Hemant, you win any poll against PZ as far as I’m concerned. Hands down.

  • Brian Macker


    You could have made the other choice “The Pope” or “Mother Teresa”.

  • ironflange

    There goes PZ, cooking another poll.

  • Anonymouse

    This, I think, is a reverse reverse reverse pharyngulation…

  • sharky

    You made me giggle.

  • Heidi

    “Everyone else” is singular, mind bending as that might be.

    Thank you!! I am so glad someone pointed that out before I got to the bottom of the comments.

  • Robin Lionheart

    Who’s the most godless atheist?
    a) one atheist who is (within epsilon of) 100% godless
    b) everyone else in the world who are at best perhaps 21% godless*

    If you didn’t want PZ to be clearly the right answer, you should have written b) as “someone else” or the like.

    * “The Ontario Consultants on Religious Tolerance puts the number of non-religious worldwide at 806 million (17%) and the number of Atheists (not included in the foregoing) at 211 million (4%).”

  • No one ever says

    “Um, It’s me isn’t it?”

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