Asking the Imaginary Man in Sky for Help

July 20, 2009

Thanks go to The Onion:

Weakling President Asks Imaginary Man In Sky To Bless Nation

WASHINGTON — In a display of weakness unbecoming a head of state, President Barack Obama concluded remarks to his nation Tuesday by asking a pretend man who lives in the clouds to watch over and guide the United States.

“Thank you, and may God bless America,” said the clearly insecure president, who, by seeking the aid of an imaginary being who is neither his ancestor nor someone with whom he shares a tangible harmonious relationship, freely admitted that he has little faith in himself and his inept team of jester advisers…

It’s funny because it’s true…

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment

wall0645

Hahaha, so great! I love the Onion!
Erik

To help understand the writing style of this article, the whole Onion website has been redone as if it was sold to China and it’s now an agent of Chinese government propaganda. I love the Onion.
jynnan_tonnyx

Looking at the rest of the site, it seems that this is part of a sort of Chinese theme day, satirizing government-controlled media.

So this article is more a satire of Sate Atheism in China than a parody of Western theism. Hence lines like “an imaginary being who is neither his ancestor nor someone with whom he shares a tangible harmonious relationship” and “Mindless spirituality reportedly inhibits progress and remains a bulwark against government rule”.
TJ

Here’s another fantastic one from the Onion:

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/oh_no_its_making_well_reasoned
hoverFrog

Who is weaker then: the current POTUS or the last one?

Obama is taller. I reckon he could take Bush in a bare knuckle fist fight.
Heidi

As long as Cheney didn’t shoot him first.
Thilina

Obama is taller. I reckon he could take Bush in a bare knuckle fist fight.

True, but abuse against the mentally handicapped is immoral (no matter how funny it is). I guess it would be ok if Bush fights someone with the same mental ability but abuse against children is also immoral. (sorry to any children offended by being comparing to Bush).
Kahomono

Clicked through to the story and this ad was linked.

OMFSM!
Twin-Skies

@hoverfrog

I read somewhere in a magazine (Men’s Health I think) that Obama was once able to benchpress 200 lbs. So yeah, he can totally take on Bush in a bout of fisticuffs

On the other hand, Dubya can Matrix-dodge as he did with that shoe, so he just might have a chance…