Introducing Your Atheist Partner to the Evangelical Parents

Then again, most evangelicals don’t wear foot-long crosses around their necks.

Yes, because releasing a video onto the Internet with a clearly visible and readable credit card number and expiration date is always a good thing…

Here’s how my girlfriend did it and I would advise against doing it this way. She’d only been at university for a couple of months and one Sunday morning at breakfast when she was at home for the weekend she said something like this: “Mum, I’ve got a boyfriend.”
Her mother, a church council member in an evangelical* church was speechless so she continued: “He’s coming with me next time I come home, so that we can go to xxx…”
At some point her mother started to find her voice again: “What??..When?..How long..? Who?”
After some quick questions her mother finally said: “OK, I suppose I’ll prepare the guest bedroom for him then.”
To which my girlfriend very quickly responded with: “NO, he’s staying in my room!”
And this is before she even mentions that I’m a vegetarian, a fresh milk drinker, an anti-theist and a Scotsman**.

*an evangelical in Germany is probably more equivalent to Lutheran or Anglican than a US evangelical Church.
** this most Germans seem to think is cool, well at least compared to the English 🙂

I’m so glad my parents are the understanding evangelicals. I didn’t even need to come out, they caught on to my disinterest at school (were pretty upset when i stopped going to church)

and it’s gotten better from there!

The advice assumes that not believing in gods is a big thing. Isn’t it good news for the evangelical as they have a captive audience to evangelise to and an opportunity to understand how those with differing views consider some topics.

Every evangelical should send their daughters out to bring home an atheist. It’s how some cults operate, trading sex for new converts. Come on Christians, get with the program. 😉