One Line Arguments Against Religion October 21, 2008

One Line Arguments Against Religion

By Guest Contributor
October 21, 2008

In one sentence, convince people that they should abandon their current religion.

(And none of you William Faulkner types, either. A 93849823-word sentence is no longer a sentence.)

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  • Gabriel

    Don’t be afraid.

  • Roger Scott

    God rested on the 7th day, so if God was to go on a holiday (but not tell anyone about it), there would still be gravity, matter, rain, snow, tornadoes, sunshine, earthquakes and so on, indicating that God is not needed to explain the world and is no more than a myth.

  • Eric

    Your book contradicts itself, it can’t be true.

  • Live life in the present; not as if there is something greater when we die and you will find as much happiness as you think you do with religion without the fairytales.

  • David Broome

    Crap, I just posted that in the wrong thread! My apologies, everyone! Still a good book, though.

  • If you were me how would you explain why I don’t believe in the things that you believe in?

  • Jordan

    Why do you think you deserve another life, when you don’t use the one you have?

    Probably won’t cause them to change their religion but it might cause them to think of why they believe.

  • Richard Wade

    All the worst atrocities in history have been committed by people who had no doubt.

  • Andrew C.

    Come to the dark side, we have cookies.

  • If your beliefs were incorrect, would you want to know?

  • HP

    Don’t let fear rule your life.

  • JSug

    You can’t prove that I’m not God.

  • Polly

    “What would god need with a starship?” – Captain Kirk

    If god seeks glory from his creatures, then he really isn’t self-sufficient, is he.

  • Sean

    You really believe that bullshit – seriously?

  • Nicole

    Give me one arguement that disproves the existence of the ancient gods that doesn’t also disprove the existance of your God.

  • mikespeir

    If you were me how would you explain why I don’t believe in the things that you believe in?

    I like that one. It’s always enlightening–and sometimes sobering–to turn the tables and ask people who disagree with you to make a sincere effort to find arguments for your position.

  • Roe

    If god loves people why does he kill babies?

  • Dan

    Babies taste better than stale wafers.

  • SarahH

    Think about the fact that your fervent religious beliefs are contrary to the fervent religious beliefs held by millions of other people who might feel the same way about you as you feel about them.

  • Siamang

    To be truly moral, one must do good and refrain from evil when no-one’s watching.

  • It’s one thing to claim that there is such a being as God, but it is quite another to claim to know anything about God other than that he/she/it exists.

  • Any argument that can be used to disprove any other god you don’t believe in can be used to disprove yours.

  • One line argument against religion?

    “Prove it.”

    I win!

  • Jeff Satterley

    Why do you consider faith, which is believing something without evidence, or even despite evidence to the contrary, a virtue?

    (Meant to deal with the people who would read some of the other arguments, and say “You just have to have faith…” I truly believe that most people don’t think about what faith really is.)

  • barelyEvolved

    There is NO evidence for ANY religion’s grand claims of divinity.

  • Jack Carter

    Try actually reading the Bible (or whatever their religion’s foundational text happens to be).

  • Ivar

    Nicole wrote:

    Give me one argument that disproves the existence of the ancient gods that doesn’t also disprove the existance of your God.

    -This gets my vote.

  • Jesus was a cross-maker.

  • Ken McKnight

    There is no god because this is a world where the following term is necessary: pediatric oncology.

  • You have plenty of time for religion when you are dead.

  • Wes

    If your religion had anything going for it in the truth department, it wouldn’t need to insist on faith alone.

  • If we accept that First Cause means the universe has to have been created (because there was simply “nothing” and then there was “something”), we would also need to realize that this Creator isn’t necessarily God (or any God at all)…so by this logic, we would acknowledge that some entity can exist outside the scope of this universe in the sense that “God” supposedly can, but also that this entity isn’t necessarily God, and therefore the Christian God is no longer necessary to explain the first cause (if He ever was).

    ^I know, I know, it’s a million words, but it pretty soundly destroys the first cause argument.

  • God doesn’t need you help.

  • Faith blinds people to the diversity, the wonder, and the majesty of life.

  • llewelly

    In one sentence, convince people that they should abandon their current religion.

    Duh.

    Ok, it’s not going to win very many people over, but I’m going for the shortest entry.

  • If Satan killed 10 people in the bible but God killed at least 1.2 MILLION people (and advocated slavery and rape), why is God good but Satan bad?

  • weaver

    I am living a happy, good life without your god.

  • weaver

    and mentioning this one just for fun

    “You can safely assume you have created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates the same people you do.” –Annie Lamott

  • Your particular religion has as much proof as any other denomination, sect, cult, myth, world religion, or even idle speculation, the moral code of your religion is not only a haphazard description of universal moral behavior, but it even falls short of the moral standards that we hold ourselves up to today, and it is rather pathetic to draw comfort and define your purpose from something so fragile, unsupported and intellectually dishonest as religion.

    I love long sentences.

  • The answer is in the question. Say to a Christian: “In one sentence, convince a Muslim that they should abandon their current religion.”

    Fill in which ever religions work in their particular scenario. Every religious person I know has a problem with another person’s religion.

  • “If you really believe that death leads to eternal bliss then why are you wearing a seatbelt?” – Doug Stanhope

    “Yesterday’s cult = today’s religion = tomorrow’s myth” – me

  • Bo

    Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.

  • Grimalkin

    “You don’t believe in Vishnu, so you’re already half-way there.”

  • penn

    What kind of omnipotent and omni-benevolent deity would allow children to die of cancer?

  • Emily

    Deities are man-made

  • If infants go to heaven automatically (no sin according to protestants) wouldn’t an abortion doctor be a great person, by sending himself to hell to send all those infants directly to heaven?

  • You will be free.

  • Saint Splattergut

    Ryan G Says:
    October 21st, 2008 at 7:48 pm

    The answer is in the question. Say to a Christian: “In one sentence, convince a Muslim that they should abandon their current religion.”

    I’m an atheist, but I can answer this question… heck, I can give the best answer any half-baked christian could give…

    WE HAVE BACON!

  • Polly

    If there’s a god, he should understand.

    or,

    If he were really god, he’d understand.

  • WE HAVE BACON!

    The most appropriate response to ANY question.

  • MisterDomino

    Weigh a mortal life spent in freedom against an eternity of servitude and see what you choose.

    -OR-

    If God created the entire universe, what makes you think he gives a damn about what you do?

  • Didn’t your parents ever teach you to stand up to bullies?

  • Jamie G.

    “And if they give birth, I will slaughter their beloved children.” (Hosea 9:16 NLT)

    or

    “Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.” (1 Samuel 15:3)

    or

    “O Daughter of Babylon, doomed to destruction, happy is he who repays you for what you have done to us- he who seizes your infants and dashes them against the rocks.” (Psalm 137:8-9)

    I could do this all day.

  • Indigo

    Elaborating on MisterDomino’s, and something I’ve actually said to a believer:
    Why would a being of infinite power and knowledge, not to speak of perfect love and forgiveness, who created everything from galaxies to quarks to living things in their untold complexities, give a crap about what we do with our genitals?

  • Jim

    What is the origin of your belief, and do you actually believe, or do you just wish you believed?

  • Scott

    No guilt!

  • William

    “no gods or kings…only man.” andrew ryan

  • The beauty of a sunset is recognizable, appreciable and inspirational even to those who don’t believe it was put there for our singular enjoyment by a mythological being; and the same goes to the rest of the multiverse as well.

  • If there really was a god, I wouldn’t be an atheist.

  • Religion does not teach us how to deal with grief because it does not teach us how to deal with reality; you constantly try to counter your doubt with religious faith, but can you at least let me give you the tools that can allow you to deal with reality in case you simply cannot believe in the religion thing anymore?

  • lurker_above

    When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

    ~1 Corinthians 13:11

  • Why?

    (That’s not a suggestion for such a sentence, BTW. I’m just trying to imagine the sort of situation in which I’d be expected to form a silver sentence sure to shoot down someone’s faith.)

  • Hows many Sins have you committed today?

  • David

    1. Religion is nothing more than a denial response to the twin fears of randomness and death.

    2. I got up to the 17th century in my philosophy book.

    (#2 actually shut a theist down cold, while a skeptical onlooker sent half a Diet Pepsi through his nose)

  • David

    If there really was a god, I wouldn’t be an atheist.

    Oh, nice! I am going to steal that, mmmK?

    Actually, I may tweak it to:

    If there really was a god, who could be an atheist?

  • David

    Is God finite or infinite?

    (they answer, Infinite, of course)

    If you really understood what “infinite” meant then you’d know how impossible it is for God to exist and yet not be OBVIOUS.

    Religion is really just a failure of mathematical education. 😉

  • Brody

    If god supposedly endowed us with logical thinking and the capacity to reason, why would he require that we surrender those abilities in order to believe in him?

  • Neil

    Atheism: You can tell me I’m wrong after we’re dead.

  • Study science, read about how we came to know what we now know, then compare your holy book to what we now know about the universe.

    If I had to put it in 2 words, it would be “Study science”.

  • TXatheist

    Zero evidence.

  • BaS

    What would it take to convince you that you’re wrong?

    Hint: That either gets them to tell you the answer, or it exposes the fact that they are not willing to be rational (and therefore not worth your time)

  • Mike

    “The only absolute truth is that there is no absolute truth.” – Me

  • «bønez_brigade»

    It’s bunk.

    [maybe not persuasive, but concise & true]

  • All the other false gods are worshiped and believed for the very same reasons you believe in yours!

  • Grow up- give up your invisible friends.

  • Christianity is the belief that God sacrificed himself to himself to appease the wrath of himself.

  • Anonnie Mouse

    LOL @ danny. That’s perfect.

    I would say, “Show me exactly how all the other gods and goddesses besides yours are wrong, without using the bible.”

  • creet

    Sorry, I never heard of Yahweh, I’m not into Pokemon.

    Idea stolen from xkcd:
    http://xkcd.com/178/

  • T’s Grammy

    Who needs a whole sentence? I’ve a one-word argument against God:

    shit

    Any meaning of the word works. Think about it.

  • Seems like people are tending to answer this question more as if it were “what would you say to make something believe their god doesn’t exist,” which isn’t really, to my reading, what the question is.

    My answer to the challenge (the challenge being come up with a sentence that would help convince people to leave their current religion) would be:

    “There were good, moral people before your religion existed, and you’ll be a good, moral person after you leave it behind.”

  • If the act of creating is a response to some need (or desire), and God is truly a perfect and whole being that exists beyond need, then the existence of a created universe is proof that God does not exist.

    For a non-created universe the question of God becomes pointless.

  • Polly

    If your god really believed in forgiveness he wouldn’t punish people forever, and that includes death.

  • Three words: Read Douglas Adams.

    It may not convince people that they should abandon their current religion, but it should be done anyway.

  • ngl

    just because you believe something while ignoring all the evidence against it doesn’t make it true.

  • Spurs Fan

    So, you and Fred Phelps have the same Holy Spirit?

  • Will

    God is all-knowing, all-good, and all-powerful, yet evil exists in the world: explain please?

  • Keerax

    What evidence that is specific, reliable, and testable causes you to believe in your religion rather than another one, other than your 2000 year old holy book?

  • “Reality exists as it does independently of what you believe about it, so the best way to discover truth is to look at reality itself.”

    “If you were to create your own false religion, do you agree that demanding complete faith, no matter what, would be a good mechanism to prevent followers from straying?”

  • Richard Wade

    If anything is an invention of the devil, it’s religion because nothing separates people from each other, people from themselves and if you insist, people from god as quickly, deeply and permanently as does religion.

  • Hell.

  • Atheist Chick

    Snakes can’t talk, they don’t have ears.

  • Your god cannot be all-knowing, and all-merciful, and all-powerful.

  • bipolar2

    The qualities of things are only . . . atoms and the void.
    ~ Democritus 500 BCE

  • “Show me some angel fossils and we’ll do business.”

  • Bob

    If the act of creating is a response to some need (or desire), and God is truly a perfect and whole being that exists beyond need, then the existence of a created universe is proof that God does not exist.

    That’s clever, but it’s circular logic. You forgot to explain away “(or desire)” Most Theists believe that their God(s) have desires.

    I’m neither Theist nor Atheist. There is neither evidence of a creator nor is there evidence that there is no creator.

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