They Just Keep Getting Younger…

Wait, where’s the baby? All I see is a typical (though unusually short) Evangelical preacher ranting incoherently.

Well, Hemant, I don’t know about you, but I can recognize a convincing argument when I hear one. That kid convinced me. I guess there is a Jesus after all. (Either that, or someone’s diaper needs changing.)

Talk about speaking in tongues.

It never ceases to amaze me what parents train their kids to do. Play musical instruments at a young age, college by age 5, passive aggression as an artform, authoritarian following, and of course Bible thumping. The kids are motivated by attention and approval, and who knows what drives the parents.

A lot of parents would find some way for their kid to be on a stage “performing” with a microphone if that’s what the kid wants to do. There are more offensive things this kid could be spouting. I do not, for example, see any advocacy of domestic violence or the objectification of women. With any luck, his parents will allow him to outgrow the microphones/shouting phase and go right on to trains and Smurfs.

Gives you a fair idea of what the father looks and sounds like.

There was a court case in England a couple of years ago where two “parents” were getting their toddlers to fight and then filming it. This reminded me of that for some reason.

Yeah, that’s kind of how pastors sound to me.

This reminds me of when my kids would babble into the toy telephone. They had my intonation down pat. Brabbeldy brabble, sentence, brabbeldy brabble intonation going up, question, pause, listen brabble. The scary one was pause “ha ha hahehe ha” brabble. I’m assuming the video was made because someone found the infant imitating the pastor humorous and that the “amen”s in the background are just for flavor. The child, however, must have been subjected to a number of sermons, which just seems weird to me.

On the other hand, as a wee kid I supposedly imitated Dinah Shore, coming down the stairs blowing kisses.

I don’t think it’s cute. It’s laying the foundation for a fundamentalist mindset. I see it as child abuse. The baby should be taken away from them. But, then, I think that most of them should have their kids taken from them (I’ve become a vindictive bastard.)

If I lived near Kirk and Chelsea, I’d be calling Social Services every day.

I strongly recommend you watch the Academy Award winning documentary “Marjoe” especially when he talks about his parents ‘smothering him a little’ when he had trouble memorizing his ‘impromptu sermons.’

Here’s what Amazon.com says.

“This classic Academy Award winner is a remarkable behind-the-scenes expose of Marjoe Gortner an evangelist child prodigy who grew up to expose himself as a fraud. MARJOE is the ferocious and extraordinary chronicle of a firebrand evangelical preacher who wholeheartedly and humorously exposes himself as a fraud. An evangelist prodigy at the age of four the film captures an adult Marjoe as he recounts how he discovered the seductions of the 60s counterculture and dropped out of preaching only to return later using his swaggering bravado to woo Pentecostal audiences out of their offerings.”

Hmm. When I had a microphone, i usually sang. Poor people who have heard my singing.

Don’t you think it’s a shame when the prey are cute? Though on my computer, it loaded 3 seconds then died. I can’t seem to resurrect it. Oh, where’s Jesus when you need him.

What in the world?! Even my younger son was saying, “WTF?!” I don’t think the toddler knows what he is doing. I’d be surprised if he did, but it is a total brainwash what they are doing and starting very young with him at that.