A conversation that took place recently:
…
[On a date]
Date: I’m psychic.
Me: Umm… CHECK!
[Check doesn’t arrive.]
Date: Give me your hand so I can find out what you are thinking.
[Date closes eyes and puts her hands on top of mine.]
Me (in my mind): You’re crazy. Stop touching my hand. You know, you could just ask me what I’m thinking…
[I scan around for our waiter.]
Date: I’m all done.
Me: And?
Date: You’re having a wonderful time!!!
Me: Wow… your powers are incredible.
…
And one more that has nothing to do with religion/skepticism:
[Phone rings]
Me: Hello?
Dude: Hi, I’m from U.S. Cellular!
Me: Mhmm…
Dude: I see that your cell phone contract with us is about to expire. I wanted to know if you were planning to renew next month!
Me: Nope.
Dude: Oh… and may I ask why?
Me: I want an iPhone.
Dude: Oh…
Me: You guys don’t work with iPhones.
Dude: Right…
Me: Yep.
Dude: You know, we have several products that work just like an iPh—-
Me: No you don’t.
Dude: We do!
Me: No. No, you don’t.
Dude: But our phones have pull-out keyboards.
Me: Right… I’m hanging up now.
Dude: [quietly] Come back to us…?
[*click*]