College Callgirl at Christian Camp

The College Callgirl recollects her childhood and time she spent at a Christian summer camp.

The kids there acted (wait for it…) shockingly unChristian!

Even at church camp, sex lurked in the forests beyond the chapel, where it was rumored that many attendees had lost their virginities. I was a graduate of the girls-only camp for the younger demographic, but the teen camp I started attending at 12 was like a den of iniquity compared to that place.

How can that be…? (Turn your innocent eyes away if you must.)

Puberty hormones and a healthy fear of God combined into a mighty aphrodisiac that had underage blondes rolling up and tying their What Would Jesus Do T-shirts to show off tan navels and the pimply, Jesus-loving boys hanging around the swimming pool drooling during the girls’ segregated swimming time. All that fire and brimstone merely stoked the fire in our loins.

But thats all outside the purview of the camp. Where’s the Bible in all of this?

… it didn’t take me long to realize that the Bible was chock-ful of kinky shit. Before I was even out of Genesis, Lot’s slutty daughters were devising plans to get knocked up by Dad. There was more rape, incest, and adultery than on Telenova, and I didn’t really notice what I was doing when one hand slipped inside my past-the-knee-length shorts.

Even with all the admittedly sinful diddling and fingering and rubbing and stroking I had done before, I had never once done something as terrible, as sacrilegious as what I found myself doing now.

You can read the post for the next sentence.

And in case you needed more proof that College Callgirl makes for an entertaining read…:

“Look who’s getting boobs!” shouted one of the girls, actually poking at the fleshy orb spilling over the top of my bathing suit. Mortified, I crossed my arms over my chest, but not before I had noticed that yes, she was right, I was getting boobs. Big boobs. Big, gorgeous boobs which would later earn me an extra 50 an hour but which at that moment seemed low on the list of things a young woman would want on her chest…

Oddly enough, while these types of stories seem to be recurring at Christian summer camps, I have yet to read similar ones from Camp Quest…


[tags]atheist, atheism[/tags]