The Atheist’s Bible July 10, 2007

The Atheist’s Bible

By Guest Contributor
July 10, 2007

Nullifidian must have a direct line to the Atheist God because he has the most recent edition of The Atheist Bible (PDF).

With a cover like this, how can you not like it?

AtheistBible

It’s short (10 pages) and to the point (3 Populations evolve).

I like this excerpt:

2 Don’t be a dick, 3 try to have a good time, 4 and try not to die.



[tags]atheist, atheism, Bible, evolution[/tags]

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  • Lee

    THIS is definitely going on my birthday wish-list!

  • Joseph Huddleston

    To the best of our knowledge at the time of writing, the universe is about 13.7±0.2 thousand million years old, 2 and the Earth is about 4.567±1% thousand million years old.

    I thought it was standard practice to go from millions to hundred millions to billion and skip thousand millions. Will this be the first controvery of the atheist bible or will millions of people conform to the old notion that a million millions is a billion.

  • Richard Wade

    (Groan) 🙄 Now every theist who wants to insist that atheism is a religion will point to this and say “See? See? I told you so, they even have their own Bible!” It won’t matter that it’s tongue-in-cheek. Even though it’s only 10 pages of mostly blank space they won’t read it. Creationists are still using National Geographic’s cover, “Was Darwin Wrong?” to bolster their arguments that science is fatally divided on evolution, despite the giant word “NO” just inside the magazine to answer the question. Actually reading a book, even their own favorite is not something they’re famous for.

  • Richard Wade

    I thought it was standard practice to go from millions to hundred millions to billion and skip thousand millions. Will this be the first controversy of the atheist bible or will millions of people conform to the old notion that a million millions is a billion.

    I think “thousand million” is the British way of saying “billion.” You’re right though, this is just the beginning of the Great Atheism Schism. In less than a century there will be bloody conflict between dozens of factions, bickering and dickering over every letter on every page.

    I’m so glad to have been alive at the beginning of this, when people knew the True Meaning of Atheism. My meaning of course, not yours.

  • Richard Wade,
    You must have seen the SouthPark epidsode on the atheist future (with different factions fighting for dominance, all of whom worship Richard Dawkins)… Too bad it’s not on YouTube anymore.

  • Richard Wade

    globalizati,
    No, I haven’t seen that SouthPark episode. I foresee these things because I have the Gift of Prophesy. As any proper prophet should, I have downloaded the Atheist’s Bible PDF file and have deleted a few things and added quite a lot about supporting all sorts of things that I favor, everything from politics to my favorite flavor of ice cream. There’s enough confusing mumbo jumbo added to keep folks coming back to me for clarification, and an address for sending your checks and money orders payable to Richard Wade. All adherents to my True Atheist Bible are urged to kill all the followers of any other version. I will nail my shamelessly plagiarized but True version to the door of the offices of American Atheists and then sit back and wait for the money to roll in.

  • Sorry Richard, it’s under a non-commercial license. You’ll need to give the big bucks to me, I’m afraid. 😉