Nick Offerman Dated a Born-Again Christian and Got an “Education” in Lovemaking

In this hilarious interview with Conan O’Brien, comedian and actor Nick Offerman told a story about how, long before meeting his wife, he dated a born-again Christian… because he was horny.

Wasn’t that a contradiction? asked O’Brien.

Nope.

OFFERMAN: My first long-term relationship was really… I was in my late teens and I was horny. And so I started dating — I got saved and started dating a born-again Christian. To try and learn about the carnal parts of lovemaking.

O’BRIEN: What?! Wait, I would think that would be the worst type of person to choose…

OFFERMAN: You would think so.

O’BRIEN: … if you’re horny, why would you choose a born-again Christian?

OFFERMAN: One would think. But it turns out there’s a lot of pent-up desire… in that sect. So if you’re a teenager, and you’re looking to get an education… go to church.

O’BRIEN: So wait a minute. Explain it to me… She would try and resist. Were you going along with this born-again Christianity thing?

OFFERMAN: … well, sure. I mean… I’m not a jerk… I walked the walk. We were teenagers, so we would try to be devout Christians, and then we would make rabbit-like passionate love, and then we would cry, for shame, and then we would pray that tomorrow night, we could resist the pleasures of the flesh

The more he talked, the funnier that story got.

He must have known about all the loopholes back then.

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